Day 13

So, today was still not awesome. For some reason I've been dealing with a headache for the past couple of days that just won't go away. It feels kind of like a sinus headache, but I'm not congested at all. There is just pressure in my cheeks next to my nose. I don't know if that area was worked on during surgery, but it's been really bugging me. I didn't sleep well at all last night. I didn't fall asleep until around 3 am and then I just kept waking up. So, again, I've been tired all day.

My mom decided to invite my aunt and her family over today so that they could get some cleaning done at the shop/storage building next to my house. I was kind of upset about it, because I've been avoiding seeing people since I still look awful and I haven't been feeling up to entertaining people, but it did force me to get up and moving and showered earlier than I would have otherwise. So, it was probably for the best. I can't avoid people forever. It was also nice because my aunt was babysitting my Godson, and I haven't gotten to see him since Christmas. I was a little worried before surgery about how he would react to my new look, but he didn't even notice. He spent a good bit of time checking out my booboos and instructing me to take my medicine, haha. It was really cute. He's totally going to be a doctor when he grows up. Total genius. So, he really perked up my mood :) I love that kid.

After he got bored with me he went back with my aunt, and I decided to nurse my headache for a while. I had intended to do some reading, but a few chapters in I just felt exhausted So I wound up taking an extra long nap. So, yeah..very unproductive day. I'm hoping tomorrow things start to get better again. I'm planning on doing some stuff around the house and maybe experimenting with cooking a little tomorrow. I'm hoping getting more active will help me start to feel better. I'm so ready to start getting my energy level back up.

No pictures again today because of all the bumming around and I just basically forgot. I'll definitely get some up for tomorrow though since it's a landmark :) It makes me really happy to realize I've gotten then far, and every day is progress.

Day 12

Today was less than great. I was kind of surprised..because I've really been feeling pretty good throughout this whole process. I think I might have over extended myself yesterday though with venturing out so much. I keep having to remind myself that I'm recovering, and I can't expect my body to be willing to do everything that it did before surgery. I just don't have the energy, and I get tired so much easier. After all the running around yesterday I went to bed early because I was just exhausted, and then I didn't really wake up until almost noon today. I haven't slept like that since right after surgery. So, I think my body was trying to tell me something. All day I've been kind of tired, and just generally not feeling awesome. My teeth have been really sore the last couple of days where the bands are, and that was really bugging me today. I've also had a headache that I just haven't been able to shake.

I didn't do any more adventuring today food wise. I just didn't have much of an appetite, and when I did get hungry I just kind of wanted comfort food. So it was back to mashed potatoes and mac n' cheese for me. Although, I did notice that eating was easier today than it was a week ago when I first tired mac n' cheese. So, that was nice. I almost didn't have to concentrate on eating while I was doing it and that was pretty refreshing.

I think I'm going to try to chill out for the next few days. I think I've been pushing myself too hard to start feeling back to normal, and that just isn't going to happen for a few weeks. I think that is one of the issues with this surgery. Most people don't know anything about jaw surgery, and so most of my friends and family don't recognize that I'm still recovering. I just don't really feel up to socializing or seeing people aside from my mom and brother. It just takes so much energy just to talk because of the massive splint in my mouth, and if I spend too much time talking my jaw get sore really quickly. Then the jaw pain leads to a headache, and its just not fun. So, I've been putting off seeing extended family or most of my friends. It's just getting to be hard on me because the cabin fever is definitely starting to set in. I've been reading other jaw surgery blogs by people who have had a much harder recovery than me, and I don't know how they did it. I mean, just the inconveniences and annoyances that I've been facing are starting to wear on me at only 2 weeks.

No pictures today. I know I originally planned on taking daily pictures, but I just really wasn't feeling up to it today, and I don't think the swelling has gone down any. I'll definitely take some tomorrow, and work on getting all the ones I've taken so far posted. Fingers crossed that I can get them all up by tomorrow night.

Day 11

Today was a pretty good day. I've been getting really tired of just staying at the house since surgery. Usually in my free time I'm constantly out and about. So, I decided to go to a movie with my brother this afternoon. It was a bit more stressful than I was expecting, but I'm glad I did it. It was good to get out of the house. Of course, I was still too self-conscious to do any more than see the movie. My face is still huge, and it's starting to bother me that my lips don't touch. I'm really looking forward to that getting better.

I got adventurous with my eating again today. After the hamburger yesterday I started to get excited about branching out a little. I haven't been able to really get full any time I've eaten since surgery, and I've just been majorly missing real solid food. So, I decided to try some pizza tonight (just plain cheese), and it was another success :) In fact, it was much easier to eat than most things I've been eating lately. I didn't make a mess at all..I just tore it into little pieces, and I was able to get almost 2 slices down! It tasted fantastic, and it was soo mice to eat semi-normally again. Being able to eat things like that are making these 5 weeks with the splint on seem a little more bearable.

Overall, my recovery so far has been a lot easier than I was expecting. I'm not feeling insanely deprived from food anymore, and I feel like I'm starting to feel more normal every day. The only thing that I'm really worried about at this point are my results. I mean, my profile is definitely better..but right now my face still looks so square, and I don't have any definition in my jaw at all. I'm really hoping that I still have a significant amount of swelling and that these things will get better. It's only day 11..so I think I'm getting worried pre-maturely since I know it takes a couple months for the swelling to fully go down, and it's not even 2 weeks yet.

Day 10

I had a hamburger today! Sort of. It was pretty mushy and I ate it with a fork..but it was still unbelievably fantastic. My energy level was also up from yesterday...I cooked the hamburgers :) I also blow dried my hair for the first time since surgery. So, it's been a pretty good day.

After taking today's pictures I looked through the other pictures I've taken over the past days since surgery, and I noticed something interesting. In all my other pictures my eyes look droopy..like I'm still drugged. I didn't realize that until I looked at my eyes in today's pictures and I look much more aware. Its crazy to me how long to drugs from surgery stay in your system. I had no idea going into this. I hope that today's extra awareness means that the drugs are finally leaving my system.

Day 8

I think today has been my easiest day so far. The first week was incredibly hard, and I'm really hoping that I don't go backward from here because I've really been feeling pretty good all day today. Yesterday my pain picked up some. I was pretty surprised because I've hardly even been taking Ibuprofen since the day after I got home from the hospital. I'm thinking it has something to do with the numbness going away and the stitches dissolving. So, today I've stepped up the Ibuprofen. I've been taking 800 mg every 6 hours. My teeth are still pretty sore, but I think I'm just going to have to deal with that, because I'm definitely not going back to the oxycodone that they sent me home from the hospital with. That stuff just makes me way too nauseous.

I've stepped up my eating today too. I can't remember how much talking I've done about my diet so far, but I haven't been much like most people I've read about. I started out on syringes, because that is what my Dr. recommended, but honestly eating stuff through them really grossed me out. They made everything taste bad. That might have just been in my head, but I just couldn't do it. So, I started trying drinking from a cup and now thats pretty easy. I've also been able to start using a baby spoon..and today even a fork! Being able to eat semi-regularly like that has been pretty great. I know most people aren't able to use those things for weeks. Anyway, as far as actual food goes it has been a lot of trial and error about what I can eat. Mashed potatoes have been really easy. I've also liked ice cream, pudding, yogurt, and cranberry sauce :). Yesterday I had a really great strawberry banana smoothie that I think I am going to put on the permanent menu for breakfast. I mixed some protein powder into it so I think it's something really great to keep trying. Today I've really stepped up my eating. I had a smoothie, part of a cheese omelet ( I was super jazzed about this because I didn't think I would be able to eat it and it turned out to be easy!), some mac n cheese, and some mashed potatos. That is the most I have eaten in one day since the surgery. Of course, I should mention how much time it took to eat all of that. Its pretty ridiculous how much work goes into eating easy things, but it was worth it to feel full for the first time since surgery.

I think numbness is a little better today. Right now I'm only numb a little under my left eye, on the left side of my nose, directly under my nose above my lip, the right side of the roof of my mouth, and in my chin.  I'm hoping that the numbness continues to get better every day. It's wierd trying to wash my face every day when I can't feel big sections of it. It has been great being able to completely feel my lips. This was something that I wasn't expecting when I woke up. I think this has been different for me because I had the inverted L instead of the BSSO. It's nice to be able to notice a benefit to going that route since I still have the big cuts on the sides of my face to deal with. Although, I think they're starting to heal. They are pretty much closed now so in the next couple of days I'm going to start using Mederma on them instead of the antibiotic cream I've been using.

The swelling has gone down a little more today although I'm still incredibly swollen. I've gotten to wear I don't want to scream every time I look in the mirror :P I think it's causing my lips to look really weird. As you can see in my pictures it looks like I'm trying to make my lips touch..like I'm pushing my top lip down to try to make it touch my bottom lip..but I'm actually not. That is just the way my lip lays. I really hate that it looks that way, and I'm praying that it is some wierd effect of the swelling. Only time will tell I guess.

Day 6

So, I haven't updated again since I was in the hospital because I've been feeling pretty unbelievably awful. I don't even remember posting my day 0 & 1 post in the hospital. I've been pretty loopy and sleeping alot until yesterday when things finally started to turn around. I haven't really had any pain, and the liquid medicine that the hospital sent me home with made me crazy nauseous. So, I stopped taking it after I had been home about a day. Since then I've learned how to take pills and switched to regular ibuprofen as needed. My biggest issue has definitely been nausea, and I'm not really sure what is causing it. I think it has something to do with not being able to eat much at all. My stomach is now reacting badly to food in general. I'm trying to eat more everyday, but it takes a ridiculous amount of time to get anything down. The good news on the food front though is that I'm not having to use syringes. After using them in the hospital and the first day home I was already sick of them. I mean to the point that they made me gag. So, I decided to attempt drinking from a cup, and after a few tries it became pretty easy. After that, I tried using a baby spoon and it was a success :) So I think I'm ahead of the curve in that area. Of course, I'm pretty lucky because I only have 2 bands in my mouth.

Numbness hasn't gotten a lot better yet. I'm still pretty numb in my chin, right under my eyes, and my nose (I wan't actually expecting to be numb there, but it's almost completely numb), but I've gotten almost all the feeling back in my cheeks. So I think there has still be progress. My biggest annoyance through at this point is my splint. I feel like if it wasn't in then I would feel pretty much normal. I feel like I have one of those football player mouth-guards in my mouth all the time, so you can imagine that my speech is pretty comical. Although, I've been able to communicate well enough with everyone without needing a whiteboard or anything like I've read a lot of people have. I just feel silly with it in. I can't get my lips to touch ( but that is also because of the swelling). It's also my biggest opponent when eating, because it covers the bottoms and back of all of my front teeth so I can't feel much. I think with practice though it will get easier.

Overall, I think I've gotten off pretty lucky. The swelling has been pretty awful (I swear I look like Frankenstein :P) but I can tell that it is starting to slowly come down. I haven't had hardly any pain. My range of motion in my mouth is pretty good. When I take my rubber bands off (which I only get to do occasionally, they're supposed to be in 24/7)  I can open plenty wide enough for a fork or regular spoon. I can almost brush normally now, and my numbness hasn't been as bad as many other people's has been. So, despite my current annoyance with the splint and the weakness I feel pretty lucky with the overall ease of my recovery so far. This is day 6 so tomorrow will be one week, and from what I've read that is supposed to be the hardest. Now that it is basically over I look forward to nothing but improvement from here. I'm not going to to lie..the first week is pretty beyond awful. There were a couple of days that I thought I was going to die, but now that I've survived that part I feel like I can start to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I'm getting more excited to see myself sans-swelling, and my new bite. I'm not yet at the point where I'm happy I did this. The next 4 weeks are really going to test my patience, but it is nice to know that I've gotten through the worst of it.

Here are my day 6 pictures. Sorry I look so awful in all of these. It has taken all of my energy just to shower before these pictures. I just want to update everyone on my swelling.

Day 0 & 1

Hey everyone! I have to say that yesterday was on the craziest/scariest days of my life. Surgery was a little after 7 in the morning, and took way longer than Dr. L originally thought it would (8 hours instead of 6..whoa!) The last thing I remember is sitting in the pre-op prep areas where I guess they gave me some kind of relaxer, because the next thing I knew I was being helped into a new bed in my room. I don't remember the recovery area at all. How crazy, right?

The first thing I was told when I woke up was that during surgery they decided to take bone from my hip instead of my head. So, I've been having a little but of a hard time getting around. They attached this baloon thing to the incision site that is constantly pumping pain meds in my hip though..so it just sore. I haven't had a ton of pain in general. The biggest issues I've had is nausea. I spent most of last night throwing up blood. I haven't had that problem much today, but I can barely swallow anything so even liquids have been a challenge. I'm hoping that starts to get better. I'm really hoping that I get to go home tomorrow. Dr. L says that everything went well, but the swelling is awful. I can barely talk at all...and it doesn't take much to make my jaw sore.

Honestly, I won't sugarcoat it..last night was hell. It's definitely going to be a rough 5 weeks. I hate not being able to talk well. I'm hoping that its the swelling that is the main issue there and not the huge splint that is in my mouth. As far as numbness goes, I'm only completely numb on my chin..the rest of my face is only slightly numb and tingly..so that sounds like a good sign. Overall..I'm just exhausted. I slept most of today. ..but I'm feeling a little better now. I'm just trying not to overdo it, and I'm really really hoping that eating gets easier, or I'm going to starve :P

Sorry this post has been kind of loopy..I'm still pretty out of it..but I wanted to get my day 1 pictures posted.